Teaching by example

Teaching by example (written in the 1980s)

When I was in medical school they taught us the way to learn.  It was a simple formula: See one, Do one, Teach one.

First we see something done, then we do it ourselves, then we teach someone to do it and then we master the subject. 

When my wife Alice was teaching seminary the teenager students were not understanding why the parents do things the way they do.  She said, “You will treat your children the way you were treated and do things the way your parents do unless you make a conscious and sustained effort to change.”

The reason for this is that example is a powerful teacher, probably more powerful than we really realize.

I once attended a leadership-training seminar.  The man was trying to teach his daughter.  She responded teach me the concept and give me an example then I can solve the problem.  This is the way the gospel works we teach correct principles and then show an example and then let people do what they have learned.  The Suzuki method of teaching music is by repeated example. Hear the music played, play it yourself, and then teach someone else to play the same piece.

We wait for people to give us an example of their feelings and beliefs before we act.  If the other person leads out with their actions and gives us an example we are more sure to follow them than if we must wait for the initiative to come from us.  Everyone waits for us to do what we are supposed to do.  We reinforce our behavior otherwise we are disappointed.  

A recent example that comes to mind is; the Catholics believe that in the Lenten season they should fast.  This means refraining from eating meat on Friday, but they still eat, just not meat.  We had two couples that were Catholics that ate with us last week. When we explained the way we fasted by not eating or drinking for 24 hours once a month and give the money for the food as an offering to the poor. Their response was, ‘you fast like the old Jews’. They probably will not change the way they fast even though the example was given, they did not believe the principle.

Christ taught by example.  A parable is an example to illustrate principles taught.  Christ used his own life and stories from life around him as an example to teach.  He used example to reinforce the teachings or principles. We remember the example long after the teaching.

The example must be one we can relate to.  If we faithfully go to the temple and do family history work, we will not teach our nonmember neighbor anything.  The example is there but it doesn't mean anything to the nonmember.  There are some things we can never teach by example they have to be taught by precept and accepted first.

Now my grandchildren,You should not only be a good example, but teach correct principles.

Love,

Grandpa